Friday, 20 February 2009

Peanut allergy breakthrough Trallwm Farm research

What an opportunity lost this was for anyone enterprising enough to have a peanut mountain stashed.
The 1st step is to start a peanut scare which stops anyone gullible enough eating peanuts when pregnant. Now anyone with common sense understands that if you have never had access to something then you are going to have a reaction to it. Children should have the chance to experience as wide a variety as possible of tastes textures and types. It establishes positive principles in as many ways as possible. That's nature and as much as humans fight her she knows best.
The next bit of this saga is you wait a few years until everyone takes it as gospel that children and peanuts should not be in the same county and then suddenly...

Piff, paff ,poff

Some one magically pulls out of the hat not a rabbit but a miracle of modern science.

Lets very quietly assume that all that research money has gone towards back tracking against government advice which wasn't right in the first place and that IF YOU FEED KIDS PEANUTS THEIR BODY ACCEPTS THEM !!!

In true K-Tel tradition you regrind and repackage and whack a good price tag on and bobs your uncle ! A whole new package to a whole new generation !
According to the statements glossing our computers and newspapers this new fangled product that will save our children from anaphylactic shock is amazing in its chemical make up.

Its peanuts.

Well ok they are squashed tis true but peanuts none the less.
I bet Asda,Salisbury's,Tescos down the road from these research and treatment centres must be coining it in with as much glee as the light bulb fiasco.
I wonder if its still possible for BBCs Dragons den gang to get involved here.
With the help of a coffee or flour grinder we have a lucrative market that will appeal to many allergic Tristan's parents as well as the more bobby basic Dwayne's foster carers.
We can opt for tescos basic range to Harrods in a tin. Chocolate covered for birthdays and Christmas and smoky bacon flavoured for early morning appointments.
If I had a peanut allergy thanks to an overpaid and under educated government official I would now be forming a group to sue them. After all we are unlikely to get our bank charges back now because they have to pay themselves bonuses whilst claiming poverty and some banks will be government property by the end of the year.

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